It doesn’t matter what kind of mum you are. Whether you’re the type that works in an office, or one that stays home with the kids, or even one that works from home while staying home with the kids, all mums everywhere have one thing in common. And we know it the instant we see each other. We can say what we want about your choices or mine, but when we share that look, we’re on the same page. Because we all know just what it’s like to give selflessly to the point where we feel empty inside.
The thing of it is though that we need to start being more selfish. We have to for our own health and sanity. In our daily lives, we are draining ourselves at the expense of our children and spouses. And what do we have left? Do we feel joy in our hearts? If the answer is a resounding ‘no’ then you must look for ways to fill your internal cup. Because right now lady, you’re running on empty and that’s no good for the people that depend on you. You need to fill yourself up because without caring for yourself, you’re going to wither away.
You are you, plus you’re a mum and perhaps a boss or an employee somewhere too. You may be a wife or you may have kicked a no-good creep to the curb in favor of giving your children a better environment without an evil dictator barking orders at you night and day. Whatever our situations are, all mums can come together and share this simple thought: that we deserve more because we ARE more than these other titles we’ve incurred over our lives.
It’s not selfish to think about the person that you were, that you are and that you always will be and nurturing that person’s needs. You didn’t just die the moment you walked down the aisle or had your children. So for the sake of your well-being, do something to save yourself before you completely burn out. Here are some suggestions to take the power back and fill yourself up in a healthy way.
Exercise your rights
Some women love exercise. Others, not so much. But for all of us, being active is important. It keeps us healthy and it can really improve our mood. Find an activity that makes you feel good that you actually like doing. It could be walking. It could be kayaking. It could be yoga. It could be anything so long as it keeps you active and makes you look forward to the experience.
Now wait. That sounds kind of boring, but hear me out. You should aim to really take care of your health now or suffer for it later. Focus on eating nutritious meals which can be delicious as well and do so 80% of the time.
Indulge some too
The other 20% of the time you’re eating, go for that pizza. Eat a slice of cake. Enjoy those things that you love to eat because life is precious and you’ve worked incredibly hard. When these things make up the smaller portion of our diets, they feel good when we eat them. When we eat too much of them though they can actually weigh us down mentally in addition to physically.
Go with out your girl friends
Women need other women. That’s because we understand husbands are ridiculous man-children that can’t find a pair of socks right in front of their face. And that while we love our children, we need to have grown-up conversations that aren’t constantly interrupted with renditions of “Let It Go” that we have to pretend aren’t making us feel stabby inside. Have your spouse or your parents watch the kids and go with your gal pals. Go to brunch. Go shopping. Just go. You need this. It is therapy.
Take on retail therapy
And speaking of therapy, retail therapy is really a thing. You don’t need to blow your savings or put yourself into debt either. But look at your wardrobe and tell me when’s the last time you bought a new shirt or jeans? New shoes? Do all your socks have holes? Is your makeup from before you had children? You deserve something new and lovely. Find something within your means to treat yourself to, even if it’s just a simple new tube of lipstick. Appreciate yourself.
Arrange for a day at the spa to get beautified. Or go to the salon for a new ‘do or getting your nails done. And if money is too tight for these services, tell your husband to take the kids to the park and out for ice cream and unwind in the house yourself with pampering treatments at home. Make a bubble bath. Pour a lovely glass of your favourite wine. Put on a mud mask and listen to your favorite songs. You’ll feel 100% better.
Take more power back every day
It’s good to treat yourself here and there, but every day, look yourself in the eye in the mirror and remind yourself how awesome you are. You are the glue that holds your family together and they need you. Appreciate yourself first and foremost and you will soon find that everything else falls into place. Remember, it’s not selfish to preserve yourself and stay strong. If you’re not able to keep it together, you’ll be no help to those you love. Loving them starts with loving yourself the most!